I actually had kind of a rough week to be honest. I've had my emotional moments throughout the pregnancy, but that is really no different than how things were before becoming pregnant. This week, though, was just an emotional week. I have felt more stressed out about work than usual because I am now working with preschoolers. They are just the cutest little kids, but they are only 4 or 5 years old and have some significant delays in their development. So, it's much more difficult to complete my assessments, especially when they hardly have any verbal communication. It was just an overwhelming and draining way to begin my week! Then, a coworker of mine, who is pregnant with twins and is due about 2-3 weeks before me, started having contractions and was admitted to the hospital. That just touches me differently now than it ever would have before...partly because I finally understand what it's like to have a life growing inside of me and also because she and I are due so close to one another. I found myself saying many prayers that day at school and really fighting back the tears. Another thing I've struggled with is all of the comments I get throughout the day from people I work with regarding my physical appearance. I know they are just trying to be nice...to be involved...and to be participate in this pregnancy. I really do get that! Sometimes, though, I just want to go to work and well...work. Each time I pass someone in the hallway, I hear "You're really showing now" or "You really popped out" or "You're getting bigger" (my personal favorite). If you play the scenario in your head, you may find it difficult to come up with a response to some of those things. Just saying, "Yep" seems rude, but honestly...what do you say? I mean, the baby is getting bigger...therefore I am getting bigger...pregnant women get bigger...it's part of the deal. :) Again, I know people are just being social. It's just hard for me to constantly feel like I'm being studied, checked out, sized up (literally), etc. I'm embarrassed to put some of these feelings out there for everyone to read, but that's the purpose of this blog...to record my experience throughout this pregnancy. Leaving out some of these feelings would make it less authentic, so hopefully you can appreciate that...even if you think I'm crazy!
With that said, I just watched a video that a friend of mine posted on her blog, and it has completely reminded me to be THANKFUL and to COUNT MY BLESSINGS that we were able to create this baby (with some help from above). :) Check it out below:
It's so important to be reminded of how lucky we are, especially as I go back into another week of preschool evaluations, comments from coworkers, etc. Whenever I start to feel down, I'm going to remember this video and consider myself the luckiest person in the world to be able to bring a life into the world, to be married such an incredible husband, and to have such awesome family and friends. Life truly is good!