We Heart the Colts

Last night Ryan, Noah, and I stayed home to watch the Superbowl. We had a few invites from friends to go watch it at their houses, but we had a really busy weekend, and Noah was getting sick toward the end of the weekend, too. Although it was just the three of us, we really had a great time watching the game together! Noah never watches TV - unless he is sick. Then, he can make it for about 15 minutes. We were so surprised when Noah actually watched the entire first quarter with us!

Mommy & Noah dressed up for Colts vs. NY Jets game

Enjoying some Arni's pizza and some Cheerios during the 1st quarter

More pizza and Cheerios

Our eyes glued to the screen!

Daddy and Noah in awe of two great NFL teams!

Would you believe Noah took this picture all on his own?

Snuggle time with Kya!

I love my family.

I know in the end the Colts didn't bring home a win, but we still love our team! I love living in a city where everyone gets so excited to watch the Colts play. Wearing jeans and Colts' jerseys to work on Fridays is wonderful, too! I'm already excited for next season to come so that we can see that sea of blue once again!

Gifts Galore

As promised, today is all about gifts that we gave others this year for Christmas.We try to keep our budget at $50 per person, though I'm always tempted to spend a lot more! Let's start with my very favorite - the gift we gave Ryan's sister and her husband. While playing around on Etsy several months ago - planning my Christmas gifts, I'm sure - I saw these wonderful framed pieces of art. You could have a word written where each letter is created by something found in the environment. For example, a "S" might be a picture of a curvy road. After doing a lot of research to find the best deal, I found the Letter Your Legacy website. Here is a picture of the final product. Their last name is Phillips - isn't it perfect?

Our total came to $112, but just as I was checking out, someone from the company sent me an instant message and offered me 10% off the cost for the picture & frame. This brought us to $103 - what an amazing deal!! So many other places charged between $150-$250. I even looked into just buying the prints and buying my own frame separate at a place like Michaels, but the cost was outrageous. As long as you place your order by noon on Friday, Letter Your Legacy will ship you your items the following Monday. This customized gift came in one week from the time I ordered it. We were very happy and look forward to working with this company again in the future!

Oftentimes when I'm planning our gifts for Christmas and birthdays, I like to buy things for people that they wouldn't buy themselves. For my brother and his wife, Kristen, we decided to buy them tickets to see Beauty and the Beast at the Fort Wayne Embassy. Check out a trailor for it HERE. Doesn't it look like so much fun?!  We loved The Lion King so much, and I'm hoping Dan and Kristen feel the same way about Beauty and the Beast!

Sidenote...

Speaking of musicals, have I ever mentioned my complete love for them?? It all started when I was in grad school and saw Thoroughly Modern Millie with some girlfriends. That was just the beginning! Since that time, Ryan and I have been to Chicago to see Wicked (Ah-mazing!). I saw Rent with my friend, Abigail, and my sister-in-law, Kelli. Abigail and I also saw Hairspray together, and it was SO much fun! Last year my mom and I saw Mamma Mia, which was phenomenal! As I previously mentioned, Ryan and I saw The Lion King with Abigail and her husband, Devin, last year. I really think it was my favorite because the visuals were amazing, and the actors' voices were unbelievably strong. For my birthday this year, my dad and Danette gave me money so that I could go see another musical! After hearing a lot of great reviews about Jersey Boys, I finally bought tickets a couple weeks ago. Doesn't it look great?? I cannot wait! We got balcony seats in the second row at the Murat, so the seats should be awesome!

Back to what we got other people...

My mom is a really special person, and just before the holidays, she and I were going through some pretty difficult things together. I wanted to pick out the perfect gift for her but was having a really hard time thinking of the perfect idea. Last year I got her a ticket to go see The Sound of Music at Beef & Boards so that we could have a fun girls' night together. Finally, the idea hit me! We would get her a beautiful diamond necklace for Christmas, and when I saw this beauty, I knew it was the right one.

Even the name for this necklace seemed perfect - Love's Embrace - because we really had to take care of each other over the holidays. Love you, Mom!

Next came my dad and Danette. They always present me with a challenge when trying to pick out just the "right" gift. What do you get people who seemingly have everything? :) I know a lot of people feel that way when shopping for their parents, and they are not alone. All of the sudden, it hit me. They love pictures - pictures of family, pictures of their dogs, pictures of friends, and of course, pictures of Noah. An old friend from high school named Desiree lives close to my parents, and she is getting her photography business off the ground. She offered us a great package deal, including the session fee and a CD of 20-30 images. My dad is really big on having images on CDs so he can make whatever prints he likes. Plus, Danette likes to make slideshows with her digital images, so it works out perfectly! I think they were really happy with their gift. This Spring they would like to get all of us together, including their two sweet puppies, and take some fun pictures with Desiree.

Ryan and I both were very blessed last year when two of our very best friends asked us to be god parents for their children.

My God Daughter, Kendall - she's a miracle baby!

Ryan's God Son, Chase - Happy birthday!!

Ryan and I really wanted to choose something special for Kendall and Chase's first Chrsitmas. We wanted to have a focus on God, as well as Jesus'; however, at less than one year old, we also wanted to find something that would be practical for their developmental stage. After much thought and may discussions, we decided that buying them each a tunnel would be the perfect gift. In their Christmas cards, we wrote Kendall and Chase a letter talking about how Jesus is a lot like a tunnel. God is at one end of the tunnel, and we are at the other. Jesus is the person who connects us to God, and He wraps around us with His love just like that tunnel wraps all the way around us. Because Kendall has two sisters - they are triplets - I also wrote about how she can share the tunnel with her sisters just like she can share Jesus' love with them, too. We had so much fun choosing these gifts, and we are excited about all of the special occasions we will share with them in the future.

I think that wraps up some of my most favorite gifts that we gave this year! I hope it helps give you ideas for your own gifts.

Wish List

Finally - I am forcing myself to sit down and write this blog! Several weeks ago, I mentioned that I would write about Christmas and birthday gifts I received this year, so here goes nothing. I want to say, though, that I really have been dreading writing this blog, but it wasn't until Sunday that I realized why.

At churh on Sunday, Pastor Danny was talking about how we need to feel content with our lives. Feeling a lack of content leads us to focus on material things rather than on what is truly important; plus, this is when we overspend, buying that new car, new house, new television, etc. Later in his sermon, Pastor Danny said, "It is more blessed to give than to receive" (Acts 20:35). That is when it really hit me - I didn't want to write this blog because I really don't care much about things. Getting gifts at Christmas time and for my birthday is nice, and I am always grateful - don't get me wrong - but I find WAYYY more happiness in giving gifts. As soon as I receive an invitation to a baby shower, bridal shower, or wedding, I am running to the store to pick out the perfect gifts! I seriously LOVE giving and cannot wait to get to Dave Ramsey's Step #7: Build Wealth & Give (mostly for the 'give' part). Receiving gifts just isn't one of my love languages, but I love picking out the perfect gifts for others. Anyway, the reason I think this blog was difficult to want to write is that I feel a little uncomfortable focusing on material things in my life. Does that make sense?

Regardless, I received SO many wonderful gifts for Christmas this year from Ryan, Noah, my parents, grandparents, my in-laws, etc. I am very blessed! Ryan and I both received a lot of money this year, and we were able to buy this new laptop. We are really happy with it for the most part! We paid cash for it, which makes us feel even better knowing we aren't going into debt with credit cards.

Aside from the money I received, I was given so many nice things this year. I won't list every single one of them, but you will get a good idea of some of my favorites!

Last year my dad and Danette gave me this exact coat from Victoria's Secret (hint: they have the BEST coats!) for Christmas. I love it so much and received SO many compliments! In fact, I liked it so much, I asked for a second one in a different print - it's black and white boccle wool. I LOVE this coat!

A few years ago, my dad and Danette introduced me to the wonderful world of Lush products. They have wonderful bath, hair, shower, skincare, and fragrance products, though the bath products are my favorite. This Christmas Star is what they gave me this year, and I have LOVED it! There is nothing more relaxing to me than taking a bubble bath and reading a good book.

I have mentioned this cookbook that my mom and Kent bought me in at least two posts, and I still love it as much as I did then. Ree Drumond has written such a wonderful cookbook, and I would recommend it to anyone who likes down home cookin', along with more Mexican-influenced cuisine. It is phenomenal! I recently made her chicken pot pie, and it was delicious. Buy this cookbook - NOW.

Mom and Kent also gave me a set of these soup and sandwich dishes, and I LOVE them! Ryan's parents bought me two of them last Christmas, and now I have four sets for when we have guests. Aren't they great?

Mom and Kent also bought me this book for Christmas. Some of my friends at church are reading this book and had a lot of positive feedback about it. I haven't started it yet but am looking forward to diving in once I finish a couple other books.

Ryan's parents bought me one of my favorite gifts of the year - Super Mario Bros. Wii! Being a kid who grew up in the 80's, Nintendo was a huge part of my life! I still love playing those Mario Bros. games from the original NES. This game has brought Ryan and me hours upon hours of entertainment! I always end up laughing so hard when we play! For the record, I am much better at this game than Ryan. :)

Ryan's parents also surprised us with this awesome snow blower for Christmas! Coincidentally, I had been talking to Ryan about possibly getting one for about a month prior to Christmas, but he kept saying that he didn't feel like we needed one. Well, he was right - we didn't need one, but now that we have one, he is LOVING it!

Ryan's sister, Kelli, and her family picked out this purse for me for Christmas! In the past, I have always had small purses, promising myself that I would never have one of those huge bags that women carry around. Well, looks like I am on my way to breaking that promise because now that I have this beautiful, big purse, I will never go back! It is so cute, and I love it!

Ryan and I set a budget of $100 to spend on each other. While that seems like a large amoun - and let's face it, it totally is - staying under $100 is challenging! On Christmas morning, Ryan handed me this gift. Tacky looking? Yes. Lots of gold bows and ribbons? Yes. Was I excited to see what my wonderful husband picked out for me? Absolutely! Drumroll please...

...ta da!! One boot in each wrapped gift - very creative! Aren't they beautiful? The Uggs had my feet going pitter patter from the moment I laid eyes on them several months ago. I am a little late jumping on the "boot train", but I say better late than never. These babies are so comfortable, and I wear them every single chance I get. I've debated about wearing them to bed. The are that comfortable! Come to find, Ryan did go over his limit, but he put his own personal money toward the extra money needed to pay for my gift. Isn't he the best?

For my birthday, Ryan got me this Sony radio/CD player/mp3 player that you install under your kitchen cabinets. I love this system! Noah and I spend a lot of our time dancing around the house, and we've spent a lot of time since my birthday doing just that. I really enjoy cooking and baking, so now I can listen to the radio, a CD, or my iPod while I'm working in the kitchen.

Am I the most blessed person you know? I really do feel like it. Life is amazingly good, and I can say without a doubt that I am more than content - I'm beyond grateful for everyone I know and everything that I have.

ERR! Did you really think I'd let it stop there? No way! I want to share about some of my favorite gifts we bought for family members this year, too. Stay tuned for the next blog where I talk about some great gifts that we gave others!

"Ta-tar! Ta-tar! Ta-tar!"

I can't tell you how many times a day I hear Noah say, "ta-tar!" everyday. Because Ryan plays the guitar in our church band, Noah has seen Ryan play since practically the day he was born. Noah even got his own guitar this year for Christmas - a little four string ukulele - and he carries it around with him all of the time! Last Friday night, Ryan and I decided to take Noah to my school's Family Fun Night where they were having food, carnival games, prizes, and a silent auction. Ryan played a game that my friend, Laurie, was hosting and won Noah a blow-up guitar. This sucker is huge, and Noah holds it perfectly, playing it while making sound effects. It is hilarious!

When I get the mail and bring in a new guitar magazine, it's hard to tell who is more excited - Noah or Ryan! They like to lay down together and look at all the "ta-tars," pointing to their favorites.

I don't know why, but seeing Noah laying flat on his belly like this cracks me up!

I'm always wondering where Noah's interests will fall. Will he be into music, play the drums, play the guitar, or sing in a band? Or would he rather play sports - football, basketball, soccer, track, cross country, golf, swimming, and/or diving? Will he like performing arts and join theatre? Will he be a leader? Will he help other kids? What kind of friend will he be? What will his teachers say about him when we got to parent/teacher conferences? Will he be a good brother someday? How will our relationship change throughout the years? I have so many questions, and I'm not in any hurry to have answers to any of them. All I know is that my heart melts when I see my two boys having fun together while looking at their "ta-tar" magazines! I love the way Noah gets excited when he notices that his pajamas or t-shirt have guitarts on them. This little facination is adorable, and I'm going to enjoy it for as long as it lasts.

The Big TWO-EIGHT

Happy birthday to me! Happy birthday to me! Happy birthday dear, Amy. Happy birthday to me!

That's right everyone! I turned the BIG 28 years old this year. For whatever reason, being 28 doesn't seem too different from being 27. I think a lot of that has to do with Ryan being older than me. In fact, he's going to be the BIG 30 this year. :) Of course I have already started planning his big day. Afterall, they say that your 30's are the best years of your life, so I want to make sure his birthday starts off with a bang.

I digress.

This is about MY birthday!

Before I share what happened this year, let's go back one year, ok? Last year on my birthday, Noah was only 8 months old. I was still breastfeeding and was READY for a break with my husband to celebrate my birthday. Well, he got sick - really sick - on my birthday. He somehow got the stomach flu and was getting sick all day long. I was stuck hanging out downstairs with Noah all day feeling sorry for myself. I mean it - I was really angry! It was supposed to be MY special day, and Ryan goes off and gets sick. How selfish! I know these thoughts were irrational, but this is a good picture of what was going through my head at the time. Birthdays mean a lot to me. In fact, I usually like to celebrate my birth week! No, I am not kidding. When I was growing up, your birthday was a big deal. It was your special day where you go to pick what you wanted for breakfast, your brother wasn't allowed to touch your presents, and you got to choose whatever restaurant you wanted to eat at for dinner. I usually picked my favorite - PONDEROSA. Again, I am not joking. I've come a long way in where I choose to eat dinner; however, my selfishness and "poor me" attitude were pretty similar to my 8 year old former self.

Ok, so that was last year when I turned 27.

On January 1, 2010, Ryan and I celebrated our 5 year anniversary. Looking back on where we were when we started and where we are now, it was incredible to see how much we've grown in the past 5 years. Marriage is hard work at times, and I was excited to celebrate our anniversary in style! Remember my blog about winning the Traincar Package? Well, we had big plans to cash in our certificate for a night on the town, even if it was freezing outside. Soon after we got home from celebrating New Year's Eve at Tim and Beckie's, Ryan was complaining of a stomach ache. He had drank about 3-4 Pepsi's and thought that the caffiene was making him sick. We went to bed, hoping it would go away by morning. Well, I woke up the next day to an empty bed. I found Ryan downstairs on the couch. He had gotten sick SEVEN times through the night. We think he might have gotten food poisoning because about 16 hours later, he was completely fine again. However, our anniversary celebration was cancelled. Ryan once again spent the day in our bedroom while Noah and I played downstairs. Rather than repeating the same attitude as last year, this time I honestly felt ok about our plans changing that day. I knew he felt horrible, so I just enjoyed dancing and playing with Noah all day. I was even patting myself on the back like, "Wow, Amy! Look how much you've grown up since last year! Good for you!"

The following weekend, I turned 28 on January 10th, and we had some exciting things planned. We were going to go see Avatar in 3D at the IMAX theatre at 3:30 p.m., and afterwards, our friends Kevin and Dalia were going to go out to dinner with us at Scholar's Inn. Ryan and I had eaten there once before and loved it! We were excited to have a night out together with friends. Ryan's parents were going to watch Noah at our house (thanks again!), so they were all looking forward to time together, too.

Soon after John and Gloria arrived, Ryan and I left for the theatre. Avatar had been out for almost a month by that time, so I didn't bother to get tickets online. BIG MISTAKE. Ryan dropped me off to buy the tickets while he parked the car, and I quickly saw a HUGE line and the words "SOLD OUT" written across Avatar's 3:30 and 7:30 showings. I WAS MAD. I stomped out to the car with my arms folded across my chest. Remember all of that "growing up" I had done over the past year? Turns out, I still had some work to do.

We spent the next 20 minutes on our phones, trying to find another movie to see in the small window of time we had before we were meeting our friends for dinner. I'm sure there were lots of other great movies to see, but I wanted to see Avatar. I had been dying to see it since I saw a preview before the Michael Jackson movie, This is It. I WAS MAD - and I decided it was Ryan's fault.

He drove back toward Greenwood, and I was getting sadder and madder with each passing stoplight. This is what was going through my head: Ryan should have planned my birthday. I shouldn't have to invite our friends, find the movie time, buy tickets, make reservations for dinner, etc. He should be the one to do that. It's MY birthday. It's supposed to be all about ME. Now my birthday is ruined. I didn't celebrate it last year. We didn't celebrate our anniversary. And now we aren't going to celebrate my birthday...AGAIN. We should cancel our plans with Kevin and Dalia. Let's just go home so I can feel sorry for myself.

Ryan in the meantime was throwing out ideas to fill the time. He could take me to get a massage or a pedicure. We could go grab a glass of wine for me somewhere. We could have an appetizer somewhere. He could take me to a book store, and I could find a new book to read. All of these ideas I shot down - even though I tried to sound grateful for the thoughtfulness, I was still MAD.

These are the thoughts that were going through my mind next: Amy, you are a real loser. Why do you care so much about a day? Maybe you are missing the point of birthdays and anniversaries. Maybe your anniversary is a day to reflect on being THANKFUL for having another year of marriage together. Maybe your birthday is a day to be THANKFUL for getting another year on this earth with people you love. Maybe it's not about YOU. Maybe it's about something a whole lot larger than your expectations for how these days should be spent.

And that, my friends, is what I call feeling convicted. Tears fell down my cheeks while we sat there in silence. I had no idea what Ryan was going to do to "fix" the day. I felt horrible about my attitude, and yet I didn't know how to make it better.

Ryan pulled into Bonefish Grill, parked the car, and said, "We're having drinks." I hestitantly got out of the Jeep and walked into the restaurant. We sat at a nice big booth in the bar, and I checked out the menu. The waiter asked us what we wanted, and Ryan grabbed a soda, while I ordered a Pinot Grigio that Ryan thought I would like (and I did). I still had tears falling from my eyes, and I think our waiter was completely uncomfortable. He would stand about 10 feet from our booth and ask us if we were ok. It was hilarious, but I didn't laugh about it until a little later. There we sat, sipping on our drinks, and all of the sudden this really chipper song came on the radio inside the restaurant. You know, it was the kind of song that says "something is about to change for the better" while you're watching a movie. It was a happy little tune, and after about 30 seconds, I couldn't contain it. I just started laughing! In my mind, I knew the way I was acting was ridiculous, but in my heart, I was still really disappointed (this is where my passion gets in the way). Ryan was laughing, too, and asked me what I was thinking. I told him that I only saw two options moving forward. One, I would plan my birthday from now on - that way I could never be disappointed on MY day (remember, it's all about me, right?), or two, he could make a commitment to plan my birthday from start to finish each year. Ryan chose the latter - he's a great guy like that.

I then shared with him how convicted I felt in the car about my selfishness. It felt good to confess that ugly part of me, even though those moments are never proud ones. We asked our still-very-uncomfortable waiter if we could have some bread and laughed about how we would probably be the worst customers he had all night. I called my friend Dalia to give her an update about the movie. I told her how mad I was about the movie because I didn't want to have to "fake it" when we saw her and Kevin later that evening. She understood because she is a passionate person, too! I enjoyed the rest of my glass of wine while Ryan and I chatted about who knows what. His phone rang, and he said, "Oh hi Rob. Ok...yeah...all right. Well, let me just give you a call, and we can talk about that more on Monday." When Ryan hung up the phone, I asked, "Why is Rob (one of his brokers/friends) calling you on a Saturday?" He convincingly said, "I have no idea" while looking very confused. We were getting ready to leave, so he excused himself to use the restroom. I sat in the booth trying not to make eye contact with our poor waiter until Ryan returned.

Once he did, we got back into the Jeep and drove to Kevin and Dalia's house. They told us to just come over a little early, and we would hang out there until our dinner reservation. After spending a little time with them and their puppy, Max, we got back into the Jeep to head downtown. Kevin said, "Amy, there has been a little change in the plans." Internal dialogue: ERRRR!! SCREEECH! What change? I don't do change! Kevin continued, "Well, we are still going to have dinner at Scholar's Inn (phew!), but...afterward Dalia and I are going to go back to your house and watch Noah so that you can go see Avatar in 3D at 10:30 p.m." We haven't known Kevin and Dalia very long, but I could've kissed them both! My once considered trainwreck of a birthday was right back on track! Turns out that the phone call from "Rob" was actually "Kevin" offering to watch Noah so that we could see Avatar.

We drove to Scholar's Inn and had a delicious dinner! Ryan and I ordered the Shrimp Cocktail for an appetizer and the Filet Mignon (with BeChamel Macaroni & Cheese, Pomegranate Red Wine Demi Glace, Fresh Herb Salad) for our main course. The food was seriously OUT OF THIS WORLD incredible. That filet ranked in my top 3 steaks ever - seriously. Macaroni & Cheese is my middle name, so that was an added bonus for sure. Dalia and Kevin were great company, too, and they seemed to really enjoy their food, as well. We were cracking up because Dalia's "Crisp Lattice Potatoes" that were served with her skirt steak turned out to be some waffle fries, just like the ones from Chick-fil-a. So much for fine dining - hilarious!

Anyway, we drove back to Dalia and Kevin's for a bit and soon after said goodbye so that we could make it to our movie with plenty of time to spare. We had already bought our tickets on the way up to dinner, so we were good to go there. Although we arrived 30 minutes early, the theatre was already PACKED. We were lucky to find two great seats and relaxed until the movie began. Seeing Avatar in 3D on an IMAX screen was seriously out of this world. The story line is incredible and the images you see are amazing. However, seeing a movie like that in 3D turns a story into an experience. I thought the movie was breathtakingly beautiful! I loved every single second of it. I especially loved the spiritual aspect of the movie and found it interesting that the Na'vi (people who live on Pandora) worship a God called Ai'wa (pronounced Ah-way), while the personal name for God in the Hebrew Bible is Yahweh (pronounced Yah-way). The movie focuses a lot on how Ai'wa is everywhere around them and can be seen by looking at the plants and living creatures on Pandora (their planet). I like to believe the same is true for us: God is everywhere around us if we just open our eyes to see Him. The movie touched my heart on so many levels, and in addition, I was entertained from beginning to end! We left the theatre around 1:15 a.m. and made the short drive home. We thanked Dalia and Kevin for helping make my birthday so special and said good night!

The next day was my actual birthday. Ryan brought Subway home for lunch after church, and I opened my gifts. I'll write more about them in a future post - he did great! Noah, Ryan, and I went out for dinnr at Unos Chicago Pizza, one of my favorites where we rarely go, and celebrated my birthday with dessert first and a deep dish pizza second. Ordering dessert first is my favorite! Noah behaved so well all evening, and the waitresses loved him. My birth-weekend was a HUGE success, one that I'll remember for years to come.

A New Name - A New Look

Hello Everyone!
I hope you are enjoying the new look for my blog. When I began writing, it was merely a way to share my experiences throughout my pregnancy with friends and family who lived far away. At the same time, it would help me actually remember all of the little things I would have otherwise forgotten. After Noah was born, I considered not writing anymore. Life was busy with a newborn. Then I realized how many new stories I wanted to share with everyone.

Here I am, nearly 2 1/2 years later, still writing this blog. When I go back through the stories, I know I never would have remembered most of them had I not written them down. That alone gives me the motivation to keep writing! However, as a bonus, I've had so many of you get in touch with me to ask questions about saving money on groceries, preparing for natural childbirth, learning about Dave Ramsey, adjusting to life with a newborn, growing in your faith, working after becoming a mother, etc. The list goes on and on! I am learning that so many of the posts I write are just seeds that get planted and sometimes grow into something wonderful in someone's life in the future. The joy I get from those moments - when I see how something I've written has sparked a positive change in someone's life - is indescribable. When I get a message on Facebook saying, "I saved $60 this week!" or an email asking me to send my immunization schedule that we used for Noah, it feels awesome!

I struggled with choosing a REAL name for my blog. I think it started as "My Pregnancy Blog" and later become "The Abell Family Blog." I wanted to choose something that described me in just a couple words, and in the end, I came up with My Passionate Balance. For those of you who have been reading my blog for any length of time (or even those who know me personally), you have probably quickly learned that I am a passionate person. Even in past job interviews when they've asked about my strengths, I will say that my passion is one of my greatest characteristics. Passion is the force that drives me to care so much about everything that I do, believe in, and say. Of course, there is a downside to being a passionate person, and I try to keep that part in check, sometimes being more successful than other times.

The second part of my blog name "Balance" stems from what I have learned to be the key to so much of my happiness in life. Without balance in any situation, I feel myself faltering. Balance keeps me from working too much or relaxing too much. Balance lets me enjoy my time with family and friends while also enjoying time to myself. Balance is how I am able to accomplish things in my day to day life. Without balance I begin to drown, falter, and lose focus on what is truly important in my life.

Passion and balance are such opposite concepts, yet one without the other in my life seems to lead to chaos. The balance prevents my passion from getting overwhelming to me, as well as everyone around me. At the same time, my passion stops my balance from becoming too orderly and confining. My Passionate Balance seems to perfectly encompass who I am and what you'll read about in my blog. As I wrote above, I want to live a transparent life in hopes of inspiring happiness in others - others being YOU! I hope you enjoy what lies ahead and that you find your own passionate balance in life.

A Mouse Named Mouf

Before I get started with this story, I want to thank all of you for your support after my last post. It felt really awesome to share with you what is in my heart, but I also felt vulnerable and insecure at the same time. I received such an outpouring of love and support, and I can't thank you enough!

Last week was so serious, and this week I want to start the week of with some fun we've been having around our house. Nearly every year for Christmas at my dad and Danette's house, one of their dogs gives me some sort of mouse. Sometimes it's a mouse ornament; sometimes it is a cat toy. Each year it takes me back to a summer day in high school when I went toe-to-toe with mouse for the very first time (and hopefully the last time) in my life.

I woke up and went downstairs to watch some TV while my dad and Danette were both at work. Our dogs, Agatha and Murphy, were home with me, too. Murphy was a little dog, but Agatha was a bigger dog full of shaggy black hair. As I was sitting watching TV, Agatha came stumbling into the room, walking around the room in a really unusual way. She was sort of stomping her feet on the ground if you can imagine that. I kept hearing a "meep, meep, meep" but couldn't figure out what it was. Agatha laid down and started pawing at one of her feet, and the "meep, meep, meep" got louder. All of the sudden, it hit me - there was a mouse stuck to Agatha's foot!! My dad had put one of those sticky pads down behind our washer, and the mouse must have gotten stuck on it. Then, in her curiosity, Agatha must have been swiping at the mouse and gotten the entire pad-with-mouse stuck to her paw. SICK!

I was F-R-E-A-K-I-N-G out! Immediately I started sweating and panicking, and frantically called my dad at work. He picked up the phone, and I was crying and telling him what was going on with Agatha and the mouse. I have no idea what was going on at work, but he said, "Amy, I can't handle this right now!" I was so mad/freaking out still that I hung up and called Danette at work. I had her emergency paged, knowing that I would scare her, but what else was I to do. Agatha was in a panic, and I was losing it. I could feel the lump welling up in my thoat, and I was close to losing it. I had no idea I was so grossed out by mice! Danette quickly called me back, and I explained the situation. She asked if I would be able to cut Agatha's hair away from the sticky pad to release it from her paw. (My stomach just turned over as I remembered this next part). I got out the scissors and pulled the sticky pad away from Agatha's foot (shiver). I was SO scared that I was going to accidentally cut the mouse while I cut her hair (SICK!). I began trimming the hair little-by-little, and Danette stayed on the phone with me like a 911 operator during an emergency situation. As I cut more and more hair, I could see that poor mouse's body smashed against the sticky pad, but it's little eyes were so scared and the "meep, meep, meeping" continued. I was crying a lot harder by now! I felt so bad for that little mouse. As I finally cut the last few strands of hair, Agatha was free. Now it was just me and that poor mouse. I was shivering and crying and holding back from throwing up as I ran the mouse-and-sticky-pad combo to the doorway and chucked it into the street. Classy - I know. Once Danette knew that Agatha and I were safe, she hung up the phone. I think I stayed in the house all day, afraid to look into the street to see that poor, sad, scared little mouse lying there.

Side note - I still struggle to this day with killing anything. If I find a spider in our house, I turn a container upside down on top of the spider and wait for Ryan to get home so that he can kill it.

My dad called later that day and was CRACKING up! He apologized for hurrying off the phone but was laughing about what Agatha and I endured earlier that day. When he got home from work, I think my dad disposed of the mouse properly. Sorry, Mouse. :(

So back to the present, I get a mouse every year in remembrance of that horrible day. This year I got a particularly nasty mouse. This one was so drab with rubbery, gross skin. When you squeeze this mouse, it feels like there are guts inside it. NASTY.

Noah was being fussy one night, and I remembered this game that he likes to play at the library. We say, "Little mouse, little mouse, are you in the red house?" You pick up the red house and say, "Nooo. Little mouse, little mouse, are you in the blue house?" And the game continues until you uncover the mouse. Noah gets so excited each time we play at the library, so I grabbed the mouse from upstairs and started playing the game with his toys.

We quickly learned that Noah takes after his mommy when it comes to mice. He loved playing Litte Mouse, but if we brought that mouse anywhere near him, he would start shuddering and shivering, too! If Noah was the one to uncover the "house" where the mouse was inside, he would lift up the house and jump a mile backwards the second he spotted that mouse. This game went on for a good hour that night. Although he still was scared of his new friend, at the end of the night, Noah made sure to say, "Nigh', nigh' Mouf."

The next morning when Noah woke up, the first thing he said was, "Hi Mouf! Hi Mouf!" He totally remembered his little buddy from the night before. Ryan put Mouf on Noah's high chair tray, so when I sat Noah down for breakfast, he pointed and yelled, "Mouf!!!" but shuddered away from him. This love/hate relationship continued for days. Noah always wanted to know where Mouf was and wanted him near but not so near that it invaded Noah's space.

Noah finally started carrying Mouf around by his tail, but after walking around for a few seconds, Noah would look down and act surprised to see Mouf and chuck his poor friend across the room just like I had done years ago. Slowly, as time has gone on, Noah has become more and more accepting of Mouf and likes for him to be near while he plays. Noah still points at Mouf every now and then and exclaims, "Ewww!!! Ewww!!!" All I can do is empathize - I've been there before - and hope a real "mouf" never finds it's way into our home again.

Even Kya tolerates Mouf